To Wong Foo Thanks for Everything, Kathryn Janeway
by the frog princess
Summary: A missing scene from the episode Vis-a-Vis.


Kathryn's head ached.  No sharp pains, just a dull thick feeling in her skull like her brain had congealed.  The bright lights of sick bay weren't helping either.   She attempted to bring her hand to her face to shield her eyes from the glare, but her arm wasn't cooperating.  It felt alien to her, wrong somehow.  She misjudged the distance and ended up hitting herself in the head.  She groaned and her voice sounded wrong too. 

"Oh, there you are Captain," the doctor was suddenly hovering over her with a scanner.  "We were worried when you didn't regain consciousness sooner. The phaser hit wasn't that severe.  I suspect the DNA transfer itself added to your recovery time." 

"DNA," Kathryn repeated hoarsely, "transfer?" 

He switched off the scanner with a flick of his finger.  "But you seem fine now." 

"I don't feel fine," Kathryn insisted in a voice that definitely sounded wrong to her.  Wrong, but familiar. 

"What's the last thing you remember?" the doctor prompted. 

"Tom Paris," Kathryn began, but stopped short.  The memory connected with the familiar voice.  "Tom Paris," she began again, "went berserk and attacked me.  And then --." She paused, at a slight loss for words.  "And then, he started to shape shift into -- into me." 

"That's essentially correct," the doctor said.  "Only, of course, it wasn't really Tom Paris at all.  It was the alien Steth who had swapped DNA with Tom Paris, or more accurately it was a different alien who first switched DNA with Steth." 

"Say again?" 

"It doesn't matter," the doctor insisted.  "It's all taken care of now. The criminal, in your body, is now in the brig.  And Tom Paris, in Steth's body, and Steth, in heaven knows whose body, are working on reversing the process." 

"Which would make this--," Kathryn hesitated slightly, examining the too-long arms.  She'd already figured it out.  Her head was clearing.  But saying it out loud, it sounded so silly.  "--Tom Paris's body." 

"Correct." 

"I think I need a cup of coffee." 

The doctor took the comment literally and obligingly replicated the captain a cup of coffee. 

Kathryn sipped in silence, trying not to think about the strangeness of the situation.  "And the DNA transfer is presumably reversible?" she finally asked, only after she felt she had enough caffeine in her to be prepared for the answer. 

"Almost certainly." 

Kathryn didn't think she cared for the word "almost" in this context, but she understood the doctor was not programmed for casual use of absolutes. "How long till I get my own body back?" 

"Soon," the doctor said vaguely. 

"How soon?" she demanded.  She had intended a slight edge to her voice, but Tom Paris's voice box made her sound downright threatening. Good, she thought. 

"They seem to think they'll have the process working in a few hours."  He seemed confused as to her vehement interest in the topic.  "Really," he added with a hint of the reassuring bedside manner he'd been working on (but hadn't quite perfected), "there's nothing to worry about.  You're registering as a perfectly healthy human and a few hours won't make any difference.  In fact, Steth, has been walking around in a totally alien body for the last year now without any ill effects." 

"The last year?" Kathryn repeated.  What would it be like to wear someone else's form for a year?  Would you get used to it?  Would you adjust?  Or would you spend every moment feeling your skin crawl? 

"So a few hours isn't that long to wait, is it?" 

Actually it was.  "Doctor," she said quietly, not quite sure how to phrase this.  "I need to use the facilities." 

"Facilities?" 

"Nature is calling," she hissed. 

"Ah," the doctor nodded, the light dawning.  "Can you stand or do you need a bed pan?" 

"I can stand," she insisted hurriedly.  Swinging to a sitting position she found her feet hitting the floor far sooner than she had expected.  She made a mental note to remember that she was now a lot taller than she was used to. 

"Good," the doctor said.  "There's a men's room through there." 

THE END


End file.
